The Catholic Virginian

Troubadour, madman, beggar and finally saint are names once hurled at one of the best known and most beloved saints in the Church's calendar. 

On October 4 we commemorate the feast day of St. Francis of Assisi, a man who lost his life in order to find it. Perhaps no other saint reflected the life of the Savior of the world more closely than the litde Poverello of Assisi.

Today statues of him decorate landscapes, animals are blessed on his feast day, and his descendants can be found serving the poor and the marginalized in every corner of the world. He is a saint for all seasons and for all people. I recall a Baptist neighbor once asking me if I would turn the statue of St. Francis that was in our backyard in the direction of their home in hopes that he would turn their lawn from brown to green. This was almost 30 years ago, long before St. Francis was associated with ecology and caring for the earth.

However, for a man whose understanding of God was so large and so inclusive, it should come as no surprise that he would continue to expand the vision of the world in death much the way he did in life. Like St. Francis, all are called to sainthood, perhaps not in so heroic a way as he, but we are called. And ... we have much to learn from the saint who took the teachings of Jesus literally and embraced the Gospel without compromise.

Francis grew into sainthood. Like us, he struggled with doubts and uncertainty. He was conflicted by what his head told him and by what his heart knew to be true. Even when Jesus spoke directly to Francis from the cross at St. Damiano, the youthful Francis misinterpreted the message, taking literally Jesus' instruction to rebuild his Church because it had fallen into ruin. Yet, as each conflict gave way to grace, this humble man of God discovered the deeper significance of God's invitation. The fact is: holiness happens in stages. Conversion must be ongoing because it involves returning to God with ever greater willingness to abandon thoughts and actions which are contrary to the Gospel.

If you've read the life of St. Francis of Assisi then you know his life is a prime example. Writing about St. Francis, Father Gwenole Jeusset, OFM identified three interior barriers that had to be broken down as part of the saint's conversion process. The first was the physical barrier that separated the sick from the healthy, and was shattered when Francis encountered the leper. The story is familiar. Francis meets a leper outside the city gates. His first impulse is to run from the leper, but no sooner had he fled than something caused him to return. Francis not only returned, but upon seeing him, embraced the leper and in that moment, his heart was changed. He saw Christ in the man who only moments ago had been physically repugnant. The second barrier he shattered was a form of moral leprosy. It seems there were a group of thieves living not too far from where the friars had pitched their huts. Since they were a continual threat, St. Francis instructed the friars to visit them and to treat them like any brothers who were suffering and hungry. He told them to spread as lavish a feast as they could prepare and serve the thieves with humility and good humor. He cautioned his friars to provide moral guidance. Only during a subsequent visit when they had won their friendship and trust.

The last barrier in the saint's conversion process, according to Father Jeusset was a spiritual barrier, which Francis when he visited the Egypt during the Crusades. Although Francis set out with the intention of converting him, after meeting and spending time with the Sultan, his heart was moved from a mentality of conquest to the mentality of encounter. Francis saw Christ in the Sultan and was touched by his deep love for God and his devotion to prayer.

Like the encounters with the leper and the thieves, Francis' encounter with the Muslim sultan became an encounter with Christ and whenever encounter Christ we changed. In the presence of fraternal love barriers crumble and walls that divide one against another are shattered.

As Francis' love for God became perfect, he responded to every encounter as an encounter with Christ and so his conversion was complete. Shortly after wards,  St.Francis received the  stigmata. He received not only the I wounds of Christ but nails actually penetrated his skin and so St. Francis became the personification of Christ in every way. According to Father Jeusset, the saint of Assisi did not convert the Muslims because he looked at their hearts and saw Christ. He embraced the Sultan much the same way that he embraced the leper and the thieves and after spending two weeks with him, they parted as friends who had a deep and profound respect for one another. One can only imagine what St. Francis would have to say about the kind of suspicion and hateful rhetoric that is taking place around the building of a mosque and community center in New York.

Today, let us call upon the humble man of Assisi to show us the way to peace so that we may encounter the other in a spirit of fraternal charity, recognizing every encounter as encounter - with Christ.

About Mission San Luis Rey

The Franciscan Retreat Center at Old Mission San Luis Rey offers a place for solitude, healing, and revitalization with a wide variety of  Spiritual retreats and educational programs.  The  Retreat centers is also for individuals who would like spiritual renewal. The Mission is committed to taking care of the   California cemetery http://www.sanluisrey.org/Cemeteryas part of this National Historic Landmark.

Burial considerations

In spite of these raw feelings of grief, there are many arrangements that must be made in a rather short period of time. Most often we are in need of some guidance in helping us to make the right decisions during this very difficult period. The purpose of a funeral is to give meaning to a person’s life. It’s an opportunity for family and friends to gather and remember the deceased while offering support and comfort to one another. Planning a funeral can be an emotional process with several legal and financial matters to consider. Taking these steps can help you as you plan, whether you are planning your own funeral or that of a loved one.

This service is all about remembering the deceased. The best way to remember the deceased is to think of him as in life. If the person was fun, loved Hawaii, and abhorred all things depressing, you could request that funeral guests come in Hawaiian shirts and pass out leis. If your family is more traditional or conservative, a more subdued funeral with guests dressed in black may be more appropriate. Tailor the funeral to the deceased and it will always stand out in the minds of the guests. 

When planning a funeral there are certain points which must be considered to ensure the process runs as smoothly as possible. The factors which should be considered are:

•             Budget,
•             Wishes of the deceased,
•             Wishes of Family,
•             Personal Taste,
•             Burial Site Environment,
•             Burial Site Regulations. 

Budget – funerals can be expensive and the budget will determine the type of funeral which is undertaken. Costs for the funeral directors, car hire, flowers, headstones etc. all need to be taken into account.

Wishes of the deceased – It is possible the deceased will have left specific instructions as to their funeral arrangements. Such instructions could be left in the will.

Family Wishes - consideration will need to be given to the wishes of the family when planning the funeral to ensure harmony on the day.

Personal Taste – funerals can take the form of various styles, from traditional to more personalize. This clearly depends on the wishes of the deceased and the family. Ensure that a funeral director is appointed who can accommodate and such desires.

Burial Site environment and regulation – before any plans are organized it will be necessary to take into consideration the burial ground environment and regulations. Most churchyards will have regulations in place as to the type of headstone which can be placed on the grave, as well as types of vases etc. Ensure a copy of these regulations is obtained and followed. The funeral plans must suit the environment in which the grave is situated. SanDiego cemeteries will make every effort to ensure that families have minimal worry when death occurs. They will be assisted in setting the date and time by the cemetery office. 

You should ask some questions. Is there a chapel where you can hold a memorial service close to the burial site? Are the grounds open 24 hours a day and 7 days a week? Does the cemetery offer financing options? Can you choose between upright or ground level memorial markers? Would you prefer a special section i.e. veterans? Can the cemetery manage a cremation if desired? Is the cemetery staff helpful? Look around at the cemetery as a whole. Is it well kept? Are there mausoleums? What kind are they? Is there an urn garden? Is the purchase of cemetery property limited? Can I purchase cemetery property in advance? Do I have to be Catholic to be buried there? In this way you can spend some time with the cemetery staff and get all the answers you need to make a good decision while not distressed.

Old Mission San Luis Rey Cemetery is Oceanside cemetery, founded in 1798, is the oldest cemetery in North County San Diego still in operation. Old Mission San Luis Rey Cemetery is a sanctuary offering peace of mind for you and your loved ones. Contact us for San Diego funeral services. They will be assisted in setting the date and time by the cemetery office. The Mission is committed to taking care of the California cemetery as part of this National Historic Landmark. Immediate need or advanced planning, our experienced and caring staff is available to help you.

Christian Funeral

Planning a Christian funeral is never an easy thing to do. Saying goodbye to a loved one is difficult. People grieve in different ways. Oftentimes family tension adds to the stress during an already emotionally burdensome period. 

First, before making any plans, ask family members if your loved one left specific directions for their funeral. If so, this will greatly ease the load of making decisions and guessing what your loved one would have wanted. Be sure to find out if your loved one has a funeral or burial insurance policy or prepaid arrangements with a funeral home or cemetery. Many people take out burial insurance along with their life insurance. This is to ensure that a good portion of the funeral costs are covered.

Start by arming yourself with the right attitude. Making the funeral arrangements will be less of a weight if you recognize that it can actually help you and your loved ones work through the grieving process. Begin thinking of the service as a celebration of the person's life.

If your loved one was a member of a church, they would most likely want you to ask a pastor or minister from their church to officiate the service. If the deceased had no contact with a church, you may want to rely on the funeral home to recommend a minister, or ask family members to help decide on a minister.

Once you have a plan for the service, you should sit down with the minister and go over the details:

• Any special songs you would like to include.
• Any poems, stories, Bible verses, or readings you would like to include.
• Any special speakers or singers you would like to participate.
• Any specific photos of your loved one or family you would like displayed.
• Is there a charity or a benefit you would recommend to mourners in lieu of sending flowers?
• If guests are invited to the grave side service, an announcement should be made at the end of the service.

People have many options and choices of what to do with their remains and deciding on their final resting place. Direct burial and cremation are the most popular and the most traditional choices. Other choices include organ donation (especially after traumatic deaths) or donating one's body to science. There is a growing trend for more creative options--to be cremated and then scattered or buried at sea, to be kept in commemorative urns…

Traditional Funeral Service: The traditional funeral usually includes a viewing or visitation of the body, formal funeral service, use of a hearse for transporting the body and burial, entombment or cremation of the remains. The traditional funeral is generally the most expensive type of funeral. It involves many different services and product fees including embalming and dressing the body, rental of the funeral home and hearse, costs of casket, cemetery plot, etc.

Direct Burial: With a direct burial the body is buried shortly after death, usually in a simple container. There is no viewing or visitation, so embalming is not needed. Direct burials are usually less costly than the traditional funeral. A memorial service may be held at the graveside or later. If the family chooses to be at the cemetery for the burial, the funeral home often charges an additional fee for a graveside service.

Direct Cremation: With a direct cremation the body is cremated shortly after death, without embalming. The cremated remains are placed in an urn or other container. There is no viewing or visitation. A memorial service may be held, with or without the cremated remains present. The remains can be kept in the home, buried or placed in a crypt or niche in a cemetery, or buried or scattered in a favorite spot. Direct cremation is usually less costly.

Cremation after a funeral or disposition after other delay: Delayed cremation can occur in several circumstances where the body is cremated after some time delay.

• After a funeral service, where the body is present and then cremated instead of buried.
• After the body has been donated for use by science.
• After the body has been returned sometime after the death, if the body has been lost or missing for some time.
  
  Old Mission San Luis Rey Cemetery is Oceanside cemetery, founded in 1798, is the oldest cemetery in North County San Diego still in operation. Old Mission San Luis Rey Cemetery is a sanctuary offering peace of mind for you and your loved ones. Contact us for San Diego funeral services. Every effort will be made to ensure that families have minimal worry when death occurs. They will be assisted in setting the date and time by the cemetery office. The Mission is committed to taking care of the California cemetery as part of this National Historic Landmark. Immediate need or advanced planning, our experienced and caring staff is available to help you.